Relationship Anxiety; Part 4

"let's take things slow" he said. With a puzzled look on my my face I continued sipping on my wine.

This is crazy because I am talking about a guy that just wined and dined me. From sending an uber to fetch me to buying me flowers and picking my favorite wine, I still didn't know what "let's take things slow" means or even look like.

The battle of defining love changes every single day as we continue doing the trial and error method. My biggest fear isn't me investing in another person but me investing in a person that doesn't have clear intentions. A person that can't define what it is that they want or stand for.

Everyone has a God given yearning for complete and unconditional love. Being present in a relationship or an encounter with another person requires you to know who you are and what your intentions are. The minute you start second guessing your intentions that's where you start being absent in that relationship or encounter.

Many single people find themselves in a relationship where they feel alone yet they have someone they talk to on a daily basis. The decision of being present or absent in different areas of the relationship comes from the anxiety of each individual.

"Let's take things slow" most young people feel when they say this they are protecting themselves from the other individual who might "potentially hurt them" but how do you choose to be emotionally absent yet you are sexually present? How do you choose to be mentally absent yet you are attached and attracted to this person? How do you choose to be spiritually absent yet you are exchanging spirits with this person?

Does it not scare you that the person could be mentally unstable? That their mental health could be at risk? How do you protect yourself by attaching yourself to the very same person you say you want to be far from?

If you want to give and receive love effectively you got to learn the 5 love languages. Different people with different personalities express love differently. Before we can even start preaching reciprocacy let's start with intentions. Let's be clear from the get go to what it is that we want and what it is that we stand for.

Let's avoid using words that bring confusion instead of clarity. Explain to your partner which areas you will be present and absent so you can effectively receive the reciprocacy we keep preaching.