Being a young Christian (part 5 - the edutainers)

'birds of the same feather flock together' (most of the time not always, I think) I also think one of the biggest factors in a life of a young christian is being able to control who influences you, who you keep close to you, who you hang out with because they can either bring you close to God or take you far away from him. I can't blame my friends for my ratchet behavior, yes they did it with me but half of the time they always reminded me of my "character" my "position" (being a young christian) at that time for me all I wanted to do was somehow prove to them that I could also be wild.

One of my guy friends, Eric whom I met at a camp, him and I clicked the minute we saw each other and yes we became friends and business partners (bad idea I shouldn't have mixed business with pleasure, now I'm stuck with a numb professional relationship and a friendship that is somehow also on hold because of the professional relationship). I figured because my friend Eric was a bubbly person me and him would have a relationship that sparkled with nothing but greatness. Little did I know that we actually more or less the same person. I'm very self conscious, I've always wanted to be remembered for not only bringing change but being a problem solver, the confidence was there just a little bit (I doubted myself 80% of the time I would always remind myself that it's not worth it I'm not going ace it anyway so why bother) in a nutshell I love helping and solving people's problems but I can't do that if I don't believe I can do it. Now just like I said Eric is a bubbly human being very outspoken, energetic and creative. Together we did great things even though we envied each other but we still had a little light shining that kept us going.

The envy of course grew out of hand I compared myself too much, I wanted to do everything he does (and vice versa) can you imagine a whole educator trying to entertain people even though my capabilities were limited, sounds very crazy if you ask me so I "wasted" an entire year being an "mc" simply because i told myself if my friend can do it why can't I forgetting that, that's Eric's strong point making people dance and entertaining them, as for me I'm good at making sure people engage and participate and have serious conversations that need serious answers "hosting" that is (I hosted dialogues every single month). See I did educate people during my dialogue sessions, I didn't think I did justice because of my plan was to be like Eric (well my self conscious side wanted me to prove myself) I missed so many important moments simply because I wanted to make people dance even though that's not my strong. I started questioning God for my purpose to be revealed (as if I didn't know what it was) I doubted myself day in and day out ( I became numb towards the stage even though I love being on stage) I wanted to do everything Eric does and that messed me up because on the other hand Eric was impressed with me and wanted to copy me.

When it comes to friends you as an individual need to know where do you stand, what do you stand for, what is your purpose, when you alone how can people define you, when you with your besties how can we define, is your friendship tearing you apart or is it building you. Remember your friends are a representation of who you are so choose clearly who represents you and never make the mistake of trying to fit in with your friend/s, be you stand out and let the both of y'all shine in your different spot lights. After all you do best when you in your lane so stay in it.